Tuesday, April 27, 2010

I done tol ya she was cRaZYyy...

Oh yeah. I tried to warn y'all. I been knowin' this was comin' for a LOnG time.

I finally got proof.

Homegirl done lost her ever-lovin' mind.

Me and Gingie go waaaayyyyyyy back. Not a huge secret. I know that I can never really piss her off cuz she could pretty much ruin my life. Almost every idiotic choice I have ever made was in the company of Gingie. We won't go into details, but suffice it to say that our parents deserve a special reward simply for the fact that we are both still alive. Unfortunately for us, their reward came in the form of grandchildren that are not too dissimilar from their mothers. As my loving mother always likes to remind me.... "Payback's a bitch, sweetheart."

Anywho- No matter what- it's always been me and Gingie. We got each others' back. I could tell the stupidest bald face lie to get my butt outta a jam and that girl will not bat an eyelash. She will finish the story for me. That's just how we roll. So when Gingie was sad, she came to visit me. See, what the average person may not know is the fact that I happen to be a natural antidepressant (I try to keep that on the DL, but ya know...). I have very few side effects and the ones I do have are totally worth it.

Who can you lay beside in a bed covered with cheese, grapes, Tostitos and Taco Bell singing every song you know at the top of your lungs with?

That's right....baby,


She is one of the happiest peeps I know. She makes me happy. She makes everyone happy. But lately, life has been a struggle for my 'lil friend. Mainly cuz she's retarded, but we will talk about that some other time. It brings me great joy to see her smile (you know, she's got great teeth, too). I love this girl. I want her to be happy.

It is strictly with her happiness in mind that I post this next video for you.

please enjoy. Oh- and parental guidance is totally suggested.

That is all.


Chops McGee said...

Sweet mother of pearl.

You know whats really sad? You were both stone cold sober.

Ginger Snaps said...

I've never seen that person before in all my life.

Cleo...you didn't tell Chops about the 'ritas'?

Arkive said...

As suggested, I had my parents over to supervise the viewing of this production. While I enjoyed the film, they raised a few questions:

Is "shaking it loose" a metaphor for the internal struggles of the main character?

They said wardrobe slacked off for this project but I told them that was the theme the director was trying to invoke, and to shutup.

They found the behind-the-scenes commentary from the director distracting, but I thought it blended nicely and helped expose the finer elements of the piece. Again, they were told to shutup.

They kinda left after I told them to shutup twice...

Cleopatra Jones said...

Good for you Arkive.

Put them in their place.

I think the director was quite a genius myself. Yeah, the wardrobe sucked, but we were going for a particular look.

It's all about our craft, you know. We do whatever it takes for authenticity.

Ginger Snaps said...

Okay fine...it's me. But there's a really good reason for this. Cleo made me. She said she would eat my tacos and then kick me in the throat. Twice. Have you seen this womans calves? They are not to be trifled with. So, I shook it. I'm not ashamed.

And there is nothing wrong with my pajama pants Jeffrey. I don't appreciate the mocking tone from either you or your parents.

In all seriousness though, Cleo makes me happy. She truly is a natural antidepressant. Her personality is so intoxicating you can't help but be happy around her. She loves unconditionally and fully. And never judges even if you're a dumb ass. Which I am. A lot. I love, love, love her with all my heart.

I also love Chops. Since he bought me a taco at Jack in the Box and got me to the concert in enough time to be up front. And didn't mock Gary too much while we were there. And also because he's sweet and does the best impersonation of a black hooker I've ever heard in all my days.

I also love Cleos chocolate cake. And that, my friends, is all.

Cleopatra Jones said...

She is a dumb ass. A lot of times.

I love her. A lot of times.

I have friggin killer legs.

I make good chocolate cake.

Chopsie sprung for $ .33 tacos and promised to take us to the pimps and ho's ball. He lied.

Ginger Snaps said...

He did lie about the ball. And it was the pimps and prostitutes ball. Where bitch slappin' is totally acceptable if yo ho is eyein' a playa.


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